"There exists, I grant you, a clinical depression, upon which certain remedies occasionally have effect; but there exists another kind, a melancholy underlying our very outbursts of gaiety and accompanying us everywhere, without leaving us alone for a single moment. And there is nothing that can rid us of this lethal omnipresence: the self forever confronting itself.“
— Emil M. Cioran
Anathemas and Admirations (1987)
This is my life. My depression is not severe, but it is just always there.
I love Cioran, but he is not for the faint of heart. He is known as “The philosopher of failure”. But to me, there is a sense of gallows humor that runs through his work.